melting mama

Day 1 of 28 Day Bariatric Bootcamp.

You think I'm kidding you, I know.  But, it's true.

My wee cartoon head is now physically planted on the Focus 28 Bariatric Boot Camp page -- which means -- MUST. FOLLOW. THROUGH. 

(Edited to add - Because the hate mail is rollin' in!  I chose to do this plan.  This is a self-imposed 28 day journey.  Nobody held a chocolate bar to my throat and told me I HAD to.  Though, I came close with mint chocolate fudge last week, it might have been a carbicide.)

It's very easy to quit if nobody notices -- but I will have motivation knowing somebody will be watching -- and hopefully joining in.

During this 28-day boot camp, I will be documenting my path, and really really wanting to show you a level of success.  At five years post-op, it's super-difficult to climb back onto the proverbial wagon and re-start, but I have to.  I must.  This opportunity came at the perfect time.  I have been struggling with my eating and subsequent weight re-gain for months and months.

First thing -- what's my GOAL? 

Initially, it's getting a GRIP of my grazing.  I have a real issue with taking bites here, there, everywhere and "forgetting" them. 

That's my first goal, "GET A GRIP, WOMAN." 

Which is cutting back to basics in a solid attempt to get the CALORIES under control, and in a pattern.

During this -- the side effect will be weight loss.  Weight loss isn't my goal, honestly.  I would LOVE to see loss, however I know that getting my EATING in control is more important and stopping the weight re-gain.  Weight loss is a super side effect -- I am overweight.

I currently weigh between 167-171 pounds, where I have been jiggling in for months.  This is a re-gain.  I had been close to 150 pounds a few times, and this is purely bagelenglishmuffinchocolatecheese weight.  Seriously.  My gastric bypass works.  I don't.  ;) 

A quick history, hold on:

• 320 pounds highest weight pre-op
• 298 pounds day of surgery
• 147 pounds very lowest post-op weight
• 210 pounds at 38 weeks pregnant post-op
• 152 pounds at very lowest point between pregnancy and NOW, July 2009
• 167 pounds TODAY.

My "range" is from ungodly low number to 145 pounds. I will aim for the upper end. :)  145 is a good place to land, and entirely within reach.  I am not setting a goal number nor an end date, because I am totally aware that this is a life-long process, and setting a DATE only sets me up to fail if I do not reach it.

Vitality shows in not only the ability to persist but the ability to start over.

Weight -

Food journal - (I will be adding supplements from F28 as I receive them, and reviewing each as I do so, I have a few things on hand, and I have a box on the way.)

• Oh Yeah Vanilla Creme Ready To Drink (220 calories, 32 protein)
• Iced Americano + Soy Milk two times, because I like it like that.
• Oh Yeah Vanilla Creme Light Ready To Drink (100 calories, 15 protein)
• 1 light cheese stick (60 calories)

Twitter, you suck.

Please allow me to ASK, "WTF?"

Sunday, July 5th, 2009

Weight - 167 lbs.

We took the kids out to play today, hit some horribly awful ghetto go-carts and then attempted a walk on the Cape Cod Canal.  Seriously - my husband was idiotic enough to buy "unlimited passes" for the "park" which included a go-cart track and broken down bumper boats, where only two were working in the green water.  They didn't accept debit cards - so here he is - WRITING A CHECK for $60 for three kids to go around a track four times.  O-o  He says that it's "Worth it, cause it would have been $5 each to go around once."  What a deal.  :x  Now, it's all fun and games until someone starts to cry!  This place is a serious joke. 

We took off and I said, just keep driving, we'll find something to do.  We headed to the Cape Cod Canal.  "Let's walk!"  However, several feet, maybe one quarter mile in, my son pipes up, "I HAVE to go to the bathroom."  Seeing no bathrooms, and his persistence - we left.  During this process, the baby lost her mind, she we quit and came home.  She was SO overtired she fell into deep sleep, and I was able to transfer her from the car to the porch swing to nap, which has never happened.  I guess she partied hard yesterday - and the lack of sleep also showed today.  "I see da fiah-works, and dey scaaared me."

• Leftovers:  Chicken egg roll thingamabobs from dinner that I didn't touch.
• Organic fruit/grain bar from the farmers' market yesterday, tasty!  (I also bought a bean salad that got wasted, and I will totally be finding this booth again.)
• One half of a  "Angus" burger patty, 1/4 of the bread from McD's = FAIL, pickles.  The patty was nasty - dry - hard and tasteless.  The "roll" stale?  I figured it would be at least better quality or something.  ICK.
• 1 serving NSA light ice cream
• 1 half Pure Protein Bar

Graphic tummy tuck - abdominoplasty video.

Actual procedure, on a not-so-excess-skinned female. I imagine that the operation on a post massive weight loss patient looks SO much more delicious. Now I'm visualizing Mr. MM's flaps cut off. UGH.

The best part about being fat...

From Postsecret today:

I urge you to send in your WEIGHTY SECRETS!

Share your secret, anonymously.

Tall Ships in Plymouth, MA

I didn't purchase tickets to get on the three boats that are docked in the harbor right now, The Mayflower (which is here all the time,) "The Amistad, and "The Peacemaker." I came home and looked up the last two - and sort of wish I HAD.

Anti-fireworks.

We left long before the chaos of the pyrotechnics.