The fun never ends.

I should probably say that this post is a paid advertisement for Dr. Loren Borud, but it isn't. 

I get a lot of keyword searches for him, my blog is on the first page of Google results for his name, and I feel a slight twinge of guilt because most of the folks that are out there Googling for Plastic Surgeon information are landing on pages sometimes that look like they might be filled with angst and complications, and they really shouldn't be.  When I searched on my own, I landed on a page that said, "death," and I was all, "wait, ain't nobody died!" but that's the way searches work - they pick up words on a page together and give you a result.

Now, why is my blog on the first page of results for his name?  I don't know - but - I am starting to think it may be in direct correlation to numbers of procedures occurring within his office that are directly related to me. 

How are they all related to me?  Well, it's all my fault.  I had WLS first.  MIL swore she'd "NEVER DO IT, EVER."  She saw Bob & I have success, and she did it.  Now, she's all skinny and poop and having everything lopped off, and that is indirectly my fault.  Oops. Let's review.

MIL's procedures with Dr. Borud:

• Panniculectomy
• Abdominoplasty
• Full lower body lift
• Butt lift + lipo
• Brachioplasty, both arms
• Face lift (Waddle removal)
• Revision of waddle removal
• Thigh lift (Today.)
• Upper body lift/breast lift (I don't know what she's having done, but it's happening right now.)

The Spouse:

• Panniculectomy + Muscle Repair
• Thigh Lift
• Cyst Removal

SIL: (When closer to goal. She's already discussed it.)

• Panniculectomy + Hernia Repair ASAP
• Other things WILL follow, I know it.

Me (In the future, 6+ months or more because I'm a medical mystery, and I'm broke.):

• Panniculectomy/Full abdominoplasty
• Boob job
• Brachioplasty (I said I didn't want it done, but I can't possibly go FOR life without wearing a short sleeve shirt, so I'd like this done at some point in the future.

I know I've referred to some of these procedures by the wrong term, but, any of you post weight loss surgery people know what I am talking about, but **JESUS H. CHRIST WOMAN, NO WONDER people are looking for answers on your bah-laaawg. 

(Oh.  I never intended these things when I started spewing on the internet.  Take note, kids, what you say can and will be held against you, the end.  I don't mean anything really by that - it's just that - once you use a name on the internet, it's cached like, forever, and it will keep coming back.  Then again, it can work out in other ways, like the T-Shirt says, "I Will Blog You," so be nice.)

I guess this was the long way to post that "Yes, she's having more plastics today."  I will continue to blog the experiences good or bad or indifferent, because that's what I do.  So there. 

*PS.  Don't even try to price that out, it's giving me an anxiety attack.

Comments

[atyourcervix]

Before WLS, I swore, I would only look into having the stomach fixed. Then I started losing weight, and noticed the arm flab. I added brachioplasty to my list, along with the panniculectomy. Then I noticed the thigh saggage. Add a possible thigh lift to that list. Now the boobs are totally deflated. Nuh nuh, not adding boob job to the list.

Now, recovering from an unexpected triple hit of gallbladder removal, and two hernia repairs, I'm starting to rethink all of the plastics. Do I want to go through the post op pain AGAIN? I'm bouncing back quicker from my latest (needed) surgeries, but do I really want to/can I afford to, take more time off of work to recover from plastic surgery too?

Can I afford surgery itself? (doubt it)

[mexicanphilanthrapistvacuumparty]

that is not good