melting mama

A-freakin-mazing weight loss.

And he ain't done yet.

Proof, yet again, that people from the internet don't always kill you.

(Because when we went to the YPD 5K I did not have a memory card in my camera, and it doesn't function without it, here's proof that I was actually there.)

You can tell we aren't really sweatin', because we were way too content.  Next year, if we do this or any other "race" again, there may be actual panting, sweating and dying.

That's Miss Jennifer on the left and her babies, chillaxing.

My baby was about a half-mile up the road, where Dad had taken off with her in an umbrella stroller just to prove that he wasn't a sea-slug and doesn't live on Dunkin' Donuts muffin tops and Cinnamon Roll guts.

After we didn't sweat, we ate.  Photographic evidence was taken.

I am eating a half-hamburger.  My ass thanks me.  The thing is - I don't take photos of my ass.  Nor do I look half bad from the shoulders up.  But, I gasped when I saw this.  I never, ever, really realize the scope of the issue until I see photos of my own self from the waist down.  Before you try to soothe me with:

"Beth, but you're not fat.  You look good."  or,

"But, wouldn't you feel better about it if you didn't have the excess skin?"

I do not need to hear those things.   It's not appropriate.

Listen, I am overweight, borderline obese.

I am a typical average fat American woman.  (Sure, my bits are floppy and droopier than the average woman, but considering the rate of weight loss surgery in this country, normal is not normal anymore.)

For a former morbidly obese woman, that ain't half-bad.

For a post RNY patient, it's slightly better than the curve.

I don't have to love it though.  I don't have to accept it.  But, as long as I eat cheesy bread for dinner at random intervals, I will have to deal with it.  I don't eat enough calories to maintain this kind of unfit fat body.  Apparently I must at some point to make up for it, because I have been this size or within ten pounds of it for years (except during the very end of the pregnancy in October 2006, I got up over 200 pounds again) but my theory is still a fucked up metabolism.  One cannot live on 1,000 calories most of the time, and gain weight, unless you have a RNY. that is.

But whatever.  The point was, although I'm 162-164 lbs, I'm still much fat.  I hate using numbers as goals, because they are like dangling a carbohydrate in front of me.  They don't work.

happy peep day.

Save a Peep, Eat Ham.

Your eating plan aside - regardless of what you're going to put in your mouth - what are you making for dinner tomorrow?

How hard is it for you to cook for family + friends for big holiday meals like this?  Does it provoke a lot of stress and anxiety over "the food?"

How do you cope?

And, finally, what WILL you put on your plate, honestly? (Don't tell me 2 ounces of turkey and a scoop of peas, if you're really going to be eating Baklava and Candied Yams all day long. )

Oh, and, Happy Peep Day.

I spent the day, today, as I normally do pre-holidays, screwing something up and requiring another trip to the grocery store, wherein the produce item necessary isn't available. 

This morning, while I was cooking the cruciferous ness for my Cauliflower + Broccoli Death By Cheese casserole dish, I overdid it, (distracted by the Toddler of TERROR) and ended up with mashed cauliflower - which - in a sense is totally fine but nobody eats it.  That, and it's green, because I was cooking my broccoli with it.  Nobody will eat Green Garlic Parmesan Mashed Caulitatoes, it's a perfect gastric bypass'er food though.

Several hours later - I got a big pan of the death by cheese done - and a smaller pan of actual mac and cheese because the cheese overfloweth - and a dozen eggs straight from the devil complete with olive eyes.  Tomorrow, at MIL's, I'll cook the ham, turkey (it's just a smallish hotel-style job), roast the asparagus, and warm everything else up.  My mother is bringing lasagna + manicotti (which I woulda preferred adding the pot'o'meatballs, but, you know...)

*The casserole is basically this mac + cheese recipe, with some added spices and I change the cheeses out a bit - I used gruyere, cheddar, parmesan, + gorgonzola this time.  Bread crumbs in butter or panko on top.

Things heard in a WLS household -

Upon finding a very newly acquired bag of "organic sandwich cookies" on the top of the trash early this morning:

I had to ask:

"Did you had a fight with the cookies last night?"

"Yes."

"Who won?"

"I did.  I only had six."

"I think that means the cookies won."

DietTV.com

Something to check out - DietTV.com - they've been online a while - but the site rolling out a bunch of new changes and spreading the word.  Now, I had never heard of Diet TV, and I'm there now playing with it's features.  Maybe a review will follow.

DietTV.com is a new free, social network for people who want to lose weight and get healthy. The website harnesses the wisdom of the weight loss community to promote healthy and successful lifestyle changes.

You are about 247 calories over your recommended daily caloric intake for today.

Yahoo.  That's a good day.  Something noticed with this medication - it makes you feel a little bit weird in your belly.  You are hungry, you want to snack, but, sometimes, with the first bite of what you thought you wanted?  You are sent, spitting it out because it Tastes Like Wet Dog.  It could be a good thing, for someone like me who mindlessly picks, but, I can see where it could interfere with meals for someone else.

Some of you don't like it when I use the word...

..."shiver."  But, sometimes that's all I can come up with when I read things like this.  Kim!  Geez.

The Biggest Loser Nalgene Bottle and Brita Filter Giveaway!

Brita and FilterForGood are partnering with “The Biggest Loser” to eliminate bottled water from the show in efforts to help contestants reduce their waists and their waste.

Bottled water waste has become a very real environmental concern, with more than 38 billion disposable bottles sent to U.S. landfills last year.

So, I'm giving some away.  I've got a few four bottles and four Brita filters to give away to my readers. (A value of nearly $50.00)

What do you need to do?  Leave a comment on this post (or donate 5 cents to my plastic surgery fund I'm having plastic surgery in a month and rolling pennies, I'm only half-kidding here, because that looks like a bribe, doesn't it?)

Your comment, it need not be anything special - I'm going to give the goodies away randomly.  (Really.  You can't bribe me.  Unless, you also have chocolate, a Venti Soy Quad Cappuccino and ISS Oh Yeah Bars, and a hot little male housekeeper, that I really need at this point.)

Good luck!

Update:  I've got the bottles and filters today, there are four of each to give away.

BRITA® On Tap System - White/White

The most advanced Brita water filtration system for healthier, great-tasting water, right from your tap. It eliminates 98.7% of the Lead and reduces Sediment, Chlorine (taste and odor) and also reduces chemicals that may be linked to cancer risk (TTHM, benzene, TCE, toxaphene) that may be in your water.

• 2-Stage Filter - added layer to trap sediment
• Electronic LED filter replacement indicator flashes red when the filter should be replaced
• Attaches easily with no tools
• Easy to switch from filtered to unfiltered water
• Easy to change filter
• Filter is included

Retail cost of this item, $37.99

And the bottles:

Say a little...

...something for Jen, a prayer a chant... something.  I'm not the praying or hugging type, but I got the urge to squeeze her just now and tell her it's going to be okay.  She's a brave, brave girl.  Please be well, Jen.

What is normal, anyways?

A post from Dagny this morning made me start thinking in circles. 

Forgive me if this post rambles.

That, and I've Been Up Since 4am!  Someone who shall remain nameless thought it would be fun! to start her day at that undogly hour.  So, I got up as normal, and started cleanin' house.  Now, she's already gone down for a half of a nap, and whining again now, so she'll be back in bed by nine, I'm sure.

Anyhow - what I'm thinking about is how we as WLS'ers create some sort of new normal after living gastrically altered for a long time.  I know I've written about this before, several times, but I don't realize that what I do is not normal until I read about someone else doing it too, in a much more restrictive way.  But, who defines normal?  Not me, and probably not you, either.

She writes: 

I have not sat down to what anyone would consider a "normal" meal in over two years. A main course, side dishes, a salad, bread. I have not had a full plate of food with multiple courses in front of me since before my surgery. I go out to restaurants and order an appetizer I pick at while I focus on chatting with my dinner companion. The only food I keep in my home is yogurt and flaxseed which I consume together. I currently have a few cans of beans but they've been in the cabinet awhile. I used to keep a few cans of soup on hand (only tomato or bean) but I haven't bought any soup in maybe a couple of months. I used to always have milk but I seem to have phased that out now too. You know, I should check the expiration dates on those cans of beans. I have many kinds of teas. I have sugar-free lemonade drink mix. I have a Sam's Club institutional-size box of Sweet N' Low. I have two pitchers of brewed iced tea. I have a LOT of protein powder. Six jugs on hand right now. And a well-stocked up supply of vitamins and supplements."

That got me thinking - would I EVER bother "grocery shopping" as I do or keeping anything on hand if I didn't have five other mouths in this house? 

Probably not. 

I have always said that I do not eat meals, hardly ever.  In fact, I sat down to a plate of dinner, chicken, stuffing, carrots and a scoop of potatoes made FOR me by my husband last night, in perfect portions, and ate it over two "snacks."  I haven't done that in ages.  I felt terrible afterwards, but I'm just sayin' - I ate a meal!