Deceptively Delish By Me.
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XXX Food Porn and a Rebirthday.

Yesterday was my sister-in-laws' one year post-gastric bypass anniversary, though I do not think she realized it until, we were all sitting around a table at The Cheesecake Factory (appropriate, no?) for lunch.  We were chatting about how long it had been since our surgeries, since there are four of us who've been RNY'ed in the last four years.  We were all taking way too much time deciding what to order, and ordering entirely excessive amounts of food for our small bellies. 

She looks up, and says, "What is today's date?  Wait, I'm one year out, today."  I said, "Well, happy freaking birthday."  She laughed, but... you know, it's she doesn't really get the celebration aspect of the whole "I'm a beautiful butterfly it's mah rebirthday" crap.  Neither do I, so I was being entirely sarcastic.  I suggested that we tell the server that it's "her birthday!!" and get a cupcake slathered in frosting to celebrate her not being able to eat it.  No, I didn't, but it was very tempting.

To be honest, we left before the meal was through - because Someone Very Small decided to poop during lunch.  (I know, I know, Bob's got to learn!)  So, we missed dessert.  Boo.

We did some serious walking around the unknown to me mall, trying to find the bathroom, when I realized, "Bob, your pants are wet.  Really.  You wet your pants."  He looked down, "I'm leaking.  A lot."  His pads sprung a leak, and he was dripping onto his jeans on both leg incisions.  So, not only do I have smelly baby in the mall and can't find a potty, but I have a cowboy who can't walk right because it looks like his horse is too wide, and he's dripping.

After getting everything cleaned and dry, I decided to go back to The Cheesecake Factory to pick up a slice of the Low Carb Cheesecake to bring home.  I'd never been there, and I was dying to try it.  I had no idea that it would cost me $6.50 for one piece, but I had to get one.

"Creamy and delicious and baked in a graham cracker walnut crust, our 6 Carb Original Cheesecake™ has all of the great taste of our Original Cheesecake with just 6 net effective carbs per slice. You'll never know the carbs are missing!"

I cut the 600 calorie (yes, it's true!) slice in half, and went for it.
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Dear dog, I couldn't take it.  It was the almost the most delicious cheesecake I have EVER eaten in my life.  A close second to the gingerbread cheesecake made by my local bakery, but unfortunately The Cheesecake Factory 6-Carb cheesecake wins out for ME, because it's made with Splenda, so I can eat like, half a slice without curling up into a ball of sick.

It has a graham cracker crust with nuts, that is sweet and dense.  The actual cheesecake has a light airy creamy texture - that was heavenly to me - even with my sensory issues with foods.  Many cheesecakes make me gag - I can't stand the texture of a fake "Jello" type cake - and this, Ain't No Jello Cheesecake.

The Cheesecake Factory doesn't need any product pimpin' from a silly old blogger like me, but I had to do it.  I loved it that much.  I made sweet food love to my spoon, for like, half an hour with this damn cheesecake and it's low-carby goodness.

I woke up this morning, considering, perhaps?  "Lunch at The Cheesecake Factory?  Wait, forget lunch, let's just get a slice of cheesecake and split it for our meal - since that's all we can really have?"

I. almost. made. him. drive. there for a slice of cheesecake.  We went and bought new rolling trash buckets instead, you know, so I could get an application to be the Wal*Mart Greeter.

Forget giving me advice or a couple of bucks in the Paypal (who takes a cut, WTF?) SEND MORE LOW CARB CHEESECAKE!!!

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