meltingmama has logged in for 30 days in a row!
That's a miracle.
I never follow through with a food journal (we know this through past history) thirty days is a big freaking deal.
As much as I bitch, moan and complain about it, food journaling works.
Journaling shows me immediately where the concern areas are -- and Where I Am Screwing Up. It's glaringly, painfully obvious what needs to change and why I don't lose weight when I think I should. Because I am Too Busy Grazing Bites Of Crackers - Cheese - Cheese - and How About That Cheese? As soon as I make myself accountable to writing it down, at least 75-95% of the time - I do it so much better.
I screw up constantly.
I break rules.
I am a huge mess.
I can do this.
Join me if you want?
"I can't believe I..."
Are you holding grudges against yourself? Are you hating on your own choices on that day --- and the days following? How do you manage a full "holiday season" of temptations?
What about learning be be a little kinder to yourself -- do you think that would help?
(MM is NODDING YES, BECAUSE, YES! Because... yes.) And, in our weight loss surgery community, THERE IS A WHOLE HELL OF A LOT OF SELF-LOATHING in regards to choices one makes.
I am bad in a whole lot of people's eyes in our community, for a variety of reasons and also because: I have a logo that contains THE INSINUATION OF A CUPCAKE, y'all. Food is not bad. People are not bad. It's all choices and how you handle situations. /end rant
Take this quiz from Jean Fain, that I found on HuffPo this morning:
The Self-Compassionate Eating Quiz
This quiz measures your current state of self-compassion by helping you assess your mental, emotional, and physical reaction to diet, weight, and body image. When you can find a quiet moment away from distractions, take a pen or pencil and sit down to reflect on how compassionate you are toward yourself.
Check eight statements that come closest to reflecting your general experience. That is, they should reflect how you most often feel in the situation described.
___ 1. When I eat something "bad," like a donut, I can't stop thinking about how I've blown it.
___ 2. After an indulgent weekend, I trust myself to rein in my eating.
___ 3. I often feel alone with my eating issues, but I know I'm not.
___ 4. When I eat junk food, I try not to beat myself up too much.
___ 5. I may feel uncomfortable if I'm bloated or a few pounds heavier, but it doesn't stop me from enjoying social activities.
___ 6. I might never love my body, but I know I'd like it better 10 pounds lighter.
___ 7. No one struggles with eating like I do.
___ 8. I don't trust myself to eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm full, but I'd like to learn.
___ 9. I can get down on myself when I'm bloated or a few pounds heavier, but I'll still go out in baggy clothes.
___ 10. Paying attention to my hunger makes me want to eat, so I try to ignore it.
___ 11. I'm always interested in what my body has to say about hunger and fullness.
___ 12. If I lose one to two pounds per week, I'll never reach my goal weight.
___ 13. I'd like to jumpstart my weight loss with a crash diet and then eat healthfully.
___ 14. I didn't stick to my eating plan the whole weekend; all my weight-loss efforts are for nothing.
___ 15. When I eat something less than healthful, I try to savor it all the same.
___ 16. I really indulged myself over the weekend; I'm afraid to step on the scale.
___ 17. When I feel bloated or especially fat, I won't leave the house.
___ 18. After overeating, I feel like punishing myself, but I know restricting and purging only make me feel worse.
___ 19. Overeating is a signal to care for myself more, not less.
___ 20. After I overeat, self-punishment (restricting food intake and/or purging, vomiting, or over-exercising) is the only thing that makes me feel better.
___ 21. My weight takes care of itself when I feed myself delicious, nutritious food.
___ 22. When I'm overweight, I feel gross; I hate my body.
___ 23. Everybody overeats and feels stuffed on occasion.
___ 24. I love and respect my body.
Give yourself 1 point per statement for checking any of the following:
1, 7, 10, 12, 14, 17, 20, 22.
Give yourself 2 points per statement for checking any of the following:
3, 4, 6, 8, 9, 13, 16, 18.
Give yourself 3 points per statement for checking any of the following:
2, 5, 11, 15, 19, 21, 23, 24.
Total Score: _____ Date: _____ / _____ / _____
Your Score and What to Make Of It
When it comes to self-compassion, 0-8 means you're sorely lacking, and you seriously need to go easier on yourself; 9-16, you've got some, but you could use some more; 17-24, you've got way more than the average American dieter, so you're in good shape. However, you can never have too much self-compassion.
Even if you're already pretty kind to yourself, know that even a slight increase in self-compassion can brighten your worldview, give you more emotional balance, help you get a handle on your eating and facilitate sustainable weight loss. (That is, if you are trying to lose weight.)
"Oh, honey, please have just a bite."
How do you TELL GRANDMA NO?"
I'll add a few choice statements, please tell me some of the winners you've heard in the comments:
- "Honey, just try this, I made it FOR YOU!"
- "But -- It's sugar free!"
- "Didn't you love this before your surgery?"
- "I thought you loved me. Just try it." (Feel free to slap this one.)
- "But, it's only a little sugar."
- "A drink won't hurt you."
- "Just two bites?"
- "COME ON."
- "You just have to have to have some of this..."
- "I thought you said you could eat this?"
- "You need the calories."
- etc, etc... and these from Sparkpeople
The Push: "It's my specialty, you have to try it!"
Your Response: "I will in a bit!"
Why It Works: Stalling is a great tactic with food pushers. Odds are the offender won't follow you around making sure you actually try the dish. If they catch up with you by the end of the party to ask what you thought, tell them that it slipped your mind but you'll be sure to try it next time.
The Push: "This [insert name of high-calorie dish] is my favorite. You'll love it!"
Your Response: "I had some already—so delicious!"
Why It Works: A white lie in this situation isn't going to hurt anybody. You'll get out of eating food you don't want or need, and the food pusher will have gotten a compliment on what probably is a delicious dish.
The Push: "It's just once a year!"
Your Response: "But I'll probably live to celebrate more holidays if I stick with my diet plan!"
Why It Works: People can sometimes see healthy eating as vain—a means to the end result of losing weight and looking better. It's harder for a food pusher to argue with you if you bring attention to the fact that you eat right and exercise for better health and a longer life. Looking good just happens to be a side effect!
The Push: "Looks like someone is obsessed with dieting…"
Your Response: "I wouldn't say obsessed, but I am conscious of what I eat."
Why It Works: Words like "food snob" or "obsessed" are pretty harsh when they're thrown around by food pushers. But don't let passive-aggressive comments like this bring you down—or make you veer away from your good eating intentions. Acknowledging your willpower and healthy food choices might influence others to be more conscious of what they eat. Sometimes you just have to combat food pushers with a little straightforward kindness.
The Push: "If you don't try my dish, I'm just going to have to force you to eat it!"
Your Response: "Sorry, but I don't like (or can't eat) [insert ingredient here]."
Why It Works: It's hard to argue with someone's personal food preferences. If someone doesn't like an ingredient whether its sweet potatoes, pumpkin, or butter, odds are that he or she hasn't liked it for a very long time. If you'd like to get creative with this one, go into detail about how you got sick on the ingredient as a kid or how your mom says you always threw it across the room as a baby. Who can argue with that?
The Push: "You need some meat on your bones."
Your Response: "Trust me, I'm in no danger of wasting away!"
Why It Works: This food push is definitely on the passive-aggressive side. Using humor to fight back will defuse any tension while making it clear where you stand.
The Push: "One bite isn't going to kill you."
Your Response: "I know, but once you pop you can't stop! And I'm sure it's so delicious I wouldn't be able to stop!"
Why It Works: This is another situation where humor will serve to distract the food pusher from his or her mission. It's a way to say "thanks, but no thanks" while making it clear that you're not interested in overindulging.
The Push: "But it's your favorite!"
Your Response: "I think I've overdosed on it; I just can't eat it anymore!"
Why It Works: If you have a favorite holiday dish that everyone knows you love, it can be especially tough to escape this push. If a loved one made the dish specifically for you, the guilt can be enough to push you over the edge. But people understand that food preferences change, and most have been in that situation of enjoying a dish so much that they can't touch it for awhile.
The Push: [Someone puts an extra helping on your plate without you asking.]
Your Response: Push it around with your fork like you did as a kid to make it look like you tried it.
Why It Works: While putting food on someone else's plate can be viewed as passive-aggressive, it was probably done with love. (Let's hope!) Making it look like you ate a bite or two can be an easy way out of the situation, but you can also just leave it alone and claim that you've already had your fill. (After all, you didn't add that extra helping!)
The Push: "Have another drink!"
Your Response: "I have to drive."
Why It Works: No one will argue with the fact that you want to drive home sober. If they do, you should have no qualms walking away from the conversation, period. If they offer a place for you to stay, you can always get out of the situation by blaming an early morning commitment or the fact that you need to get home to let the dog out. Kids will also get you out of everything.
The Push: "We have so many leftovers. Take some!"
Why It Works: Not every party guest wants to deal with the hassle of taking food with them, and this makes it clear that you'd rather the food stay. If the host is insistent, you can feign worry that they'll go bad in the car because you're not going straight home, or it'll go bad in your fridge because you've already been given so many leftovers at other parties recently. Or be polite and take them. You'll have more control of your food intake away from the party anyway. So whether you don't eat the leftovers at all or whether you split a piece of pie with your spouse, you're in control in this situation.
Quinoa. You're not eating it yet, are you? Here is a recipe worthy of your Aunt's holiday table and your post WLS belly.
Not only is quinoa high in protein, but the protein it supplies is complete protein, meaning that it includes all nine essential amino acids. Not only is quinoa's amino acid profile well balanced, making it a good choice for vegans concerned about adequate protein intake, but quinoa is especially well-endowed with the amino acid lysine, which is essential for tissue growth and repair. In addition to protein, quinoa features a host of other health-building nutrients. Because quinoa is a very good source of manganese as well as a good source of magnesium, iron, copper and phosphorus, this "grain" may be especially valuable for persons with migraine headaches, diabetes and atherosclerosis.
Black and White Quinoa Dressing With Butternut Squash and Pecans -
Source - NY Times
The light-colored version of quinoa is a fluffier grain than the black version, so it’s almost as if there are two completely different grains in this colorful mixture.
- 1 cup regular (golden) quinoa
- 3/4 cup black quinoa
- 5 1/4 cups water, chicken stock or vegetable stock
- Salt to taste
- 2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
- 3/4 pound butternut squash, cut in small dice
- 1 medium onion, finely chopped
- 1 cup diced celery
- 1 tablespoon fresh thyme leaves
- 2 garlic cloves, minced
- 1/2 cup lightly toasted pecans, coarsely chopped
- 1/3 cup dried cranberries
- 2 tablespoons chopped fresh sage
- Freshly ground pepper to taste
1. Keeping the quinoas separate, wash in several changes of water. In separate saucepans, combine the golden quinoa with 3 cups water or stock and the black quinoa with 2 1/4 cups water or stock. Add salt to taste, bring to a boil, cover and simmer 15 to 25 minutes, until the quinoa is tender and the grains display a coiled thread. The black quinoa takes longer to cook, and the thread will not pop out of all of the grains. Drain through a strainer and return both quinoas together to one of the pots. Place a clean kitchen towel over the pot and return the lid. Let sit while you prepare the other ingredients.
2. Heat 1 tablespoon of the oil over medium-high heat in a large, heavy skillet and sauté the squash, stirring often, until it is tender and lightly browned, 15 to 20 minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper and transfer to a bowl. Turn the heat down to medium and add the remaining oil and the onion. Cook, stirring often, until the onion begins to soften, about 3 minutes, and add a generous pinch of salt and the celery and thyme. Cook, stirring often, for 3 minutes, until the onion is completely tender and the celery is just tender, and add the garlic. Stir over medium heat until the garlic smells fragrant, 30 seconds to a minute, and transfer to the bowl with the squash. Add the quinoa and the remaining ingredients and stir together. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Transfer to an oiled or buttered baking dish and cover with foil.
3. Warm for 20 to 30 minutes in a 325-degree oven before serving.
Yield: Makes about 7 cups, serving 12 to 14.
Advance preparation: The entire dish can be made up to 2 days ahead. Cooked quinoa will keep for 3 or 4 days in the refrigerator and can be frozen.
Nutritional information per serving (12 servings): 173 calories; 1 gram saturated fat; 2 grams polyunsaturated fat; 4 grams monounsaturated fat; 0 milligrams cholesterol; 24 grams carbohydrates; 3 grams dietary fiber; 13 milligrams sodium (does not include salt to taste); 4 grams protein.