Plus Size Prom Dress

Shopping for a prom dress is never fun.  Nope.  Never.  No.  

At least that's the impression I have always had. 

I have been through three prom dress purchases with my own girls (and two of my own) -- and I'll tell you -- it would simply be a lot easier to slide into a size __ (...after trying on countless!) rather than having to dig through a vvveeerrrrrry limited number of plus-sized dresses and only getting to try on one or two.   All the girls in the dressing room are picking up size zeroes and twos and fours and some are in tears about needing to get the dresses altered to fit - because - they're just too big.  I am looking around at a sea of teenagers ALL. WEARING. THE. SAME. COLOR. (they always do this) and wonder why it's such a big deal.  (I know, because it's the PROM.  And YOU HAVE TO.  We all - mostly? - do it.)

After getting measured, we find that she's *exactly* a size __ and we ordered the dress she wanted out of the catalog.  It was a bit disheartening to think that the prom is this year - and she doesn't get the chance to do it next year in senior year when she might be post-surgery.  It would be kind of cool to slither into a smaller size, she knows that.  Someone will need to get married or something so we can all get fancied up in a year.  

SO ANYWAY.  We put $100 down, and have to pay the balance when it comes in.  Let's hope it fits!  She matches the EXACT MEASUREMENTS of the dress, sooooo......

 

 

On getting old.

As many of you -- I have had lower back pain for years, and in my normal Beth way I have ignored it or (...don't tell anyone!) medicated it with NSAIDS off and on, and heat, and exercise, and stretching.  AND GOD DAMN IT, IT HURTS.

Source - Healio 

NSAID use is contraindicated in gastric bypass patients as it can cause serious ulcers.  I started popping them like candy recently.  No. good.

The back pain comes  in cycles and never really goes away.  It gets to the point where I cannot ignore it and I am currently in a Flare Of I Cannot Sit Down Or Sleep Or Lay Down And Nothing Feels Right EXCEPT getting on my knees in 'downward dog' position.  When I describe it to other people they chime in with "Yep.  I live this." 

I had my husband take me to the urgent care MD on the weekend for X-Rays.  They show disc degeneration. No surprise. I suppose after ignoring it -- plus a few years of massive obesity, plus four pregnancies, losing all of the weight plus eating haphazardly and vitamin-deficiencies, it shouldn't be a surprise.  

Hooray.

I was prescribed an anti-epileptic drug instead of a pain-medicine, at my request because I do not want to be sedated, and that I am epileptic.  

Although as the doctor was describing the medication's side effects to me, he explained that it might cause "sedation, dizziness," and I stated, "... that it isn't like I do anything important anyway, I'm not using heavy machinery as it is."  

I do not know that he got my seizure humor. 

I don't feel much relief from a few days of this added medication -- and I do not feel that it will be of help to the pain, but there are more options.  I think that I will need to use exercise somehow, because this, just isn't working.  

I can't sit.  I can't sleep.  

I have a broken ass.  I. am. old.

Run run run #bostonstrong

Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry.

Hello maintenance or the no-stress apathetic no-diet plan for long term WLS patients.

I suppose this is maintenance.

I'll take it.  I apparently maintain at this caloric intake at this activity level.

• Source - http://www.caloriecontrol.org/calculator/weight-maintenance-calculator-women

It's magic. 

I have also been extraordinarily "lazy"  (in Beth terms) in the last 30 days -- with very little gym time. Calorie Control.org doesn't have a setting for extraordinarily lazy - but if they did - or a setting for extraordinarily lazy post bariatric patient who eats 1200-1400 calories per day, that would be me.

PS.  I'm not really that lazy, but, I am not about to own running half-marathons up in this bitch, because, no.

I suspect that as soon as I get back into a routine at the gym (... school is out and it's hot and we are whiny)  that one or two things will happen:

I will see a bounce up because "YAY! MUSCLE!"  Or my trend down will start again - although as it has been - very slowly.  I still have body-fat to lose while I grow/gain muscle which I desperately need.   Either option is fine with me.  I have no goal, other than health with no stress in doing so.

Welcome to the apathetic non-diet plan for WLS'ers.  

It works.  

Katie Jay Keynote Speaking at Southcoast Center for Weight Loss - Video

Katie Jay of www.nawls.com was the keynote speaker at an event at Southcoast Center for Weight Loss in Wareham, MA yesterday.

She is amazing.  

Thank you, Katie.  

Here we are -

150 patients returned to the Southcoast Center for Weight Loss Saturday for a reunion as the group marked its own milestone: 3,500 patients since Dr. Rayford Kruger launched the unit nine years ago.It is now the largest and busiest bariatric surgery program in New England, with three surgeons who perform about 650 procedures at Wareham's Tobey Hospital a year.

 

Related articles

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Clinical Practice Guidelines for the Perioperative Nutritional, Metabolic, and Nonsurgical Support of the Bariatric Surgery Patient - 2013 Update

Obesity Help Announces Keynote Speaker for 2013 National Conference

Apathy and failure

Gastric Bypass Supplements to Attend Bariatric Patient Reunion

And what then?

“In case you never get a second chance: don't be afraid!"

"And what if you do get a second chance?" "You take it!” 

― C. JoyBell C.

 

I am wondering if someone out there is holding a voo doo doll of me and hastily stabbing pins everywhere but in me. Quit it.  You're missing the target.  

We are wrapping up the end of March over here with the third (..fourth?) major life-changing event of 2013.  

I thought that if I did not blog about the first (...as much as I have wanted to, I was told no and I have been SCREAMING on the inside!  Still.  AM.  :x) or second (more?) that these things would not occur in threes or more but they do.  I still haven't written, much at all actually.  

Because stop.

Currently - my father is sitting in the Beth Israel Deaconness Medical Center in Boston, MA awaiting a Triple Bypass Heart Surgery on Friday morning after two RED FLAG WARNINGS that landed him in the ER.  

11 years ago, he had a stent placed after a mild heart-attack.  These warnings (DO NOT IGNORE YOUR HEART, PEOPLE!) happened just after he lost his job and likely stress was of no help.

What is a Triple Bypass?  

When one of the heart's arteries gets blocked and a person has a heart attack, one common procedure is to perform heart surgery and sew in a new piece of blood vessel to bridge over (bypass) the blockage. In many cases, the surgeon will fix not only the immediate problem, but also other arteries on the heart that are starting to look blocked. If the surgeon repairs three of the arteries, it is called a triple bypass. If four arteries are repaired, it's a quadruple bypass.

The positives?  

He's losing weight rapidly while in the hospital.  He had lost weight in a medically-supervised plan with his physician's office just prior to this event, but now he's busted into the 200's.

He's off the nicotine, and mentioned that the nurses kept trying to slip him nicotine-patches and he doesn't crave them.  It's been nearly a week, smoke-free!  This is a huge deal.  Hopefully after surgery and rehab he can maintain living smoke-free, he's done it before.

He can rock this.

He appreciates your well-wishes.

• "What is a heart bypass operation?"  01 April 2000.  HowStuffWorks.com.  27 March 2013.
• http://www.heart.org
  

Related articles

Weight-Loss Surgery's Weird Alcoholism Risk (It's not weird.)

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Gastric Artery Chemical Embolization GACE Procedure Helps Shut Off Ghrelin Production Without WLS

Vague blog.

It's been quite a while since Beth wrote a vague blog. 

Just quit searching, here it is: A story.

2/2012 - If you have a question, please just ask me. It feels really gross watching you search for certain words in my blog. I have hidden most of the posts. JUST ASK. -MM

Mr. asked me when I was going to start "writing my stories again."  Because he  "likes (my) stories."  Here's the start of a story.  (Bumped post from November 2011)

Did you have WLS to LOOK AMAZING?

Reposting an old post...

To stand still on the summit of perfection is difficult, and in the natural course of things, what cannot go forward - slips back.   Gaius V. Paterculus

"Quality" Inn

Image via Wikipedia

And so it begins.

Mr. just called to check in from his first stop on the road to the Mickey Metropolis.

They have checked in at a Quality Inn, in North Carolina.  All he wanted was to get the kids settled in with a movie, and get them to sleep.

But, the TV didn't work.

He picked up the in room phone?  Which?  Didn't work.

He called the front desk on his cell phone, and asked for a manager, "Sorry, there's nobody on tonight."  And, that's great.  He asked for a refund, something, anything.

Now -- they've got ants.

That there, is some Quality.

^{(Can't say I didn't warn him.  This is going to get fun.  I am willing to bet ends up back home within 5 days)}

National Espresso Day!

I am glad to know I have been celebrating appropriately for a day I did not know existed.  I might even take it a step further and hit @starbucks later for additional celebration  Or, a celebratory CLICK?  Perhaps.  

• Pumpkin Mocha Spice CLICK Latte in honor of the Thanksgiving week?

What, you don't have any?  PSSSHAAW.  Email [email protected] with "MM" in the subject line for FREE SAMPLES.  Send to a friend!  Your mama!  Your granny!  ;)

The grass, being greener, it's all pretty much the same isn't it?

Today is Mr's last day of work.  I don't know if I mentioned anything (did I?) because it seems ludicrous considering he just got this job, I know.  But, he resigned. 

The company was extraordinarily nice to him about it, asked if there was anything they could do to make him stay, and he had to really, really think it over.  This has been quite a process.  Please note, he's not crazy.  He is actually just going back to his former job, but in a different location seeing as they had to replace him.

Why?  From where I sit, I know that a big part of it is truly the commute.  He went from a job in the town WE LIVE IN to a very large town more than one hour away with traffic.  He was used to getting up and going to work just a few miles away, to getting up and leaving early and getting home late.  I told him he was crazy to take it in the first place, even if he money seemed better, it all washes out. 

I know lots of Moms + Dads commute and work far away from home, and work long hours, so apparently he was spoiled and it's not like he's making millions to make it worth being away 24/7. 

I tell you right now that if I landed a job say....pimping out dark chocolate!? in the city, for $XX,XXX a year, I would haul MY sorry arse to the train station at 5am if I had to, and I know lots DO, and that's why they have the big shiny houses not bought from a foreclosure sale, childcare and Range Rovers, too.  ;) 

Meet the Real Housewives of Massachusetts, right here.

He also got used to the opportunity to get HOME at the drop of a hat if I needed him, and the fact that I did not drive for a year, I really needed him to be available to get a sick kid, etc.  And, it's always a reality here...

I am sure I told you about the police coming to my house because I did not answer the PHONE last month or so?  Yeah, well.  That happened, and he couldn't get me by phone, email or checking in, so... he thought I had a seizure and died. 

Other than the obvious -- I think he was a bit underwhelmed or bored?  The thing is he needs to be busy -- and like projects and troubleshooting.  Sitting in a big, old-fashioned style bank, I think he was twiddling his fingers waiting for things to go wrong.  (I know, it sounds nuts.)  Consider the location, he should have been thankful he wasn't taken hostage, but he's got a few hours left.

So.  It's over, and things are left on a good note.  He starts back to his old company on Monday, everything will be the same just with a new location and staff.  After things get sorted out, he will be back to writing his own schedule and perhaps being available to us more, again.  It does work out a bit favorably, with a match in the pay he took to leave, and cutting the commute down, he's increasing his income.  With him working where he was, there was NO way I could consider taking on anything even part time (unless the above situation happened) but with this one, there's at least a slight opportunity.  Of course it's pretty unlikely with no extraneous child-care, but, I like to know that I have a LITTLE bit of time to consider it, you know... if the Willy Wonka company calls me.

Don’t beat yourself up with what-ifs

From motivational speaker Loretta LaRoche in my local paper:

It’s all well and good to visit the past if it serves as a way to learn valuable lessons that make life more meaningful. Unfortunately, most people act as if they are prisoners of their pasts. Albert Ellis, a renowned expert in the field of cognitive behavioral therapy, coined a phrase I absolutely love. He calls getting stuck in what-ifs – â€œshould-ing on yourself.”

I should have gotten a different job. I should have married someone else. I should exercise more, eat better, and on and on. If you can relax and stop “should-ing on yourself,” you’re going to enjoy life much more.

Here are some steps to help you live more in the here and now:

– Whenever you get caught up in thinking about what you should have done, stop and think about what a waste of energy that is. You can’t go back and redo it, because that period of time has passed. As long as you’re still breathing, there’s a possibility that you can do it now. However, if you have no intention to follow through, give it up and move on.

– Buy yourself a whip and keep it handy. Every time you start to drown yourself or others in “should,” grab the whip and give yourself a good beating. You’re already self-flagellating, so why not literally do it.

– Keep a “should” journal. You’ll probably be shocked to discover how many times a day “shoulda, coulda, woulda” comes out of your mouth.

– There are certain things that have to be done in life. Do them to the best of your ability and then forget about them.

– Don’t allow “should-ing” to go on at home or at work. Ask people to express themselves in better ways. “Should-ing” is filled with judging and finding fault. As a result, our surroundings become a courtroom filled with prosecutors and attorneys. Life is too precious to waste on what might have been. Get over it, get on with it, and live “now.”

What she said. - MM

*swoon*

Tonight we're going to see my future spouse in concert.  Kidding, I'm not a "fan" fan.  Eww.  In fact, Mr. just said, "I hope we're not surrounded by THOSE kind..."  We will.  Women are rabid.

Tall Ships in Plymouth, MA

I didn't purchase tickets to get on the three boats that are docked in the harbor right now, The Mayflower (which is here all the time,) "The Amistad, and "The Peacemaker." I came home and looked up the last two - and sort of wish I HAD.

Anti-fireworks.

We left long before the chaos of the pyrotechnics.

Friday.

Weight - NO.

In no particular order, in fact I had nothing until quite late.  It's bizarre, though, the minute I eat?  I FEEL LIKE DIRT.  Coincidence - or was I just tired?  I don't know, but it was immediate, you'd expect that I was noshing on carbs - but it wasn't.  The MOMENT I eat - I spiral into STARVING.

• Soy milk in coffee a bunch'o'times
• 4:30 pm - 3 half-ounce frozen meatballs + 1 Atkins Caramel Fudge Brownie Bar
• 1 low fat string cheese
• 1/2 turkey sausage/egg sandwich from frozen, minus half the bread, no egg and no cheese.  (LOL, did you catch that?  I ate the sausage and bread it sat on. The kid shared with me.)
• 2 light waffles, fake butter
• Mid-night - 4 peanut butter crackers

Totals: 1,078 52g 104g 15g 19g 64g

Special deal, holidazing and ANGST!

I just rushed to get my lawn mowed so that when you drive by it doesn't totally resemble a jungle since we have had so. much. rain. and whaddya know?  THE SUN IS OUT!  We have been living in a rain forest for weeks and weeks, and this yard is just, ick.  I miss my old yard, we had sort of gotten landscaping under control, had a fence, and it was already done.  To start over with a blank slate really blows.

So, happy fourth!  That's tomorrow.  Yay.  I don't like fireworks.  I like parties -- but no thank you on the fireworks -- and the little one is terrified of loud noises.  In fact I think the boy is actually working all day tomorrow -- and we don't have plans.  *lights a sparkler, woo*

4th of July Weekend Celebration at GastricBypassSupplements.com

This weekend only - save 10% on all purchases over $25.00. And don't forget you can get 'Free Shipping' on all orders over $99.00. Use this coupon code when your are checking out  - JULY4

Woot.  Time to stock on my liquid courage, because....

I'm starting a 28 day Bariatric Bootcamp this week!  *ANGST!* 

It's time.  I cannot go this path any further, Beth has got to get a GRIP on her snackgrazingmealignoringchewingcud.  It's never been this hard to quit -- I know a lot of it has to do with the anti-seizure meds that are WORKING... so I have to get my own grip.  I am going to be following the plan here, because look! it's mah face!  

Somehow I needed this.  I needed it NOW.  The timing is pretty damn impeccable.  Time to cut out the games and just DO SOMETHING TO GET MY REAR IN GEAR. 

I really have no excuses.  I mean, seriously, get a grip, woman.

I plan to photograph and blog my progress, it's necessary to keep myself motivated.  I will do an official weigh-in on Monday, and off I go.

This was a test.

I made it home from the grocery store during a downpour.  There were cars pulled over everywhere.  That's one way to get me excited about driving again.  Then, bringing in mostly refrigerated items in a lightening storm. 

Fun!

Memorial Day

Memorial Day came and went - I wanted to get to the parade - but Dad had to work and also had class - so we didn't get to.

Here's my photoset from last year's Memorial Day Parade: